Sunday, March 9, 2008
Monday, March 3, 2008
After a day of nonstop rain and crying, Connor told me this:
"My poor baby. I wish I could fix everything. Look we only have a little left, so smile and hold your head up, no matter how heavy it gets. It's harder than it sounds I know, but you have to deal with it somehow because I couldn't stand to see someone with the potential to do so much collapse due to a struggle he has no control over."
I'm lucky.
"My poor baby. I wish I could fix everything. Look we only have a little left, so smile and hold your head up, no matter how heavy it gets. It's harder than it sounds I know, but you have to deal with it somehow because I couldn't stand to see someone with the potential to do so much collapse due to a struggle he has no control over."
I'm lucky.
Sunday, February 24, 2008
"I made it deep inside my heart."
After making my mom dinner (and a cake) for her birthday,
I went out to dinner.
It was a relatively awkward dinner, mainly because of the relationshp math involved.
Afterwards we split up and I went to a very good friend's house.
And at one thirty in the morning, made out on the front porch, in the snow.
And the term "item" finally applies.
There's a long road ahead, but I think I'm ready to start walking it.
I went out to dinner.
It was a relatively awkward dinner, mainly because of the relationshp math involved.
Afterwards we split up and I went to a very good friend's house.
And at one thirty in the morning, made out on the front porch, in the snow.
And the term "item" finally applies.
There's a long road ahead, but I think I'm ready to start walking it.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Three Subjects of Love
1. It's wonderful that I come out of Valentine's Day with five roses. I love my my friends.
2 We're sliding away from flirtation to something more serious. I feel like there's a kiss on the horizon.
3. My mom is home, and just in time. Happy Birthday to her- 58 years and counting. She will always be the strongest person I know.
2 We're sliding away from flirtation to something more serious. I feel like there's a kiss on the horizon.
3. My mom is home, and just in time. Happy Birthday to her- 58 years and counting. She will always be the strongest person I know.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
On the Subject of Protection
demons are prowling everywhere nowadays
i'll send em howling, i don't care, i got ways
no one's gonna hurt you, no one's gonna dare
others can desert you, not to worry, whistle i'll be there...
On Thursday night, a man brought a gun into a City Hall meeting in the suburb right next to mine and started shooting. Six people were killed, and more were injured.
And while it's a tragedy in it's own right, and probaby deserving of a blog all on its own, it's not the subject of this one.
The first thing my dad said about it was, "Some asshole shot up City Hall."
It got me thinking, when is the exact moment our parents stop protecting us? I have to wonder about when my parents stopped caring about curfew, disregarded if I spent the night at a girl's house, gave up telling me I shouldn't watch R-rated movies. I'm not complaining, I appreciate that they trust me.
Yet I can't stop thinking about when they realized the world was too big and too dark to protect me from. I wonder about when they used to hold me in their arms, shield my eyes, when I lacked a thick enough skin to deal with any of it.
I was way too young to remember it now, and yet I miss it. I feel like I still need to be protected. I feel so vulnerable sometimes. I mean I'm almost seventeen; I'm not a child anymore, but that's not exactly old. I can't help feeling that we live in a scary world, and it's only going to get worse. And I realize my parents can't protect me from murder, from cancer or rape or any of that. But I miss when they tried...
Sometimes I just wish they'd take me aside and tell me, "Nothing's gonna harm you, not while I'm around."
i'll send em howling, i don't care, i got ways
no one's gonna hurt you, no one's gonna dare
others can desert you, not to worry, whistle i'll be there...
On Thursday night, a man brought a gun into a City Hall meeting in the suburb right next to mine and started shooting. Six people were killed, and more were injured.
And while it's a tragedy in it's own right, and probaby deserving of a blog all on its own, it's not the subject of this one.
The first thing my dad said about it was, "Some asshole shot up City Hall."
It got me thinking, when is the exact moment our parents stop protecting us? I have to wonder about when my parents stopped caring about curfew, disregarded if I spent the night at a girl's house, gave up telling me I shouldn't watch R-rated movies. I'm not complaining, I appreciate that they trust me.
Yet I can't stop thinking about when they realized the world was too big and too dark to protect me from. I wonder about when they used to hold me in their arms, shield my eyes, when I lacked a thick enough skin to deal with any of it.
I was way too young to remember it now, and yet I miss it. I feel like I still need to be protected. I feel so vulnerable sometimes. I mean I'm almost seventeen; I'm not a child anymore, but that's not exactly old. I can't help feeling that we live in a scary world, and it's only going to get worse. And I realize my parents can't protect me from murder, from cancer or rape or any of that. But I miss when they tried...
Sometimes I just wish they'd take me aside and tell me, "Nothing's gonna harm you, not while I'm around."
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